In this reflective essay, I will talk about two of my personal experiences with grief and loss, and the methods I use in order to cope with them. Find out about becoming a member or subscriber. It is often amazing to see old survivors of battles long ago, chokingly and tearfully recounting their story. The theory says the next stage is bargaining but it is not quite certain with whom? 1 - Professor Adrian Furnham, University College London. It is what we mammals do. However, soon thereafter on two occasions I broke down quite unexpectedly at work and had to confess why. Maybe this is what we can ask for: that the experience of loss actually expands our sense of what it means to be alive. When my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, I, like no doubt many others, decided not to talk about it. The idea is that we nearly all go through a series of reactions to the pain of loss, whether it is in anticipation of our own death or a reaction to the death of others. My research into alternative medicine and the personal experience of a school friend dying of cancer many years ago came to mind. To better assist myself, in this paper I will analyze one peer-reviewed article and two books about teen grief and link a theoretical perspective that demonstrates thoughtful evidence-based practice. Does being religious help? Yet, it is probably best not to have to deal with a tongue-tied inadequate person, which would only add to your pain. Most people feel they are good listeners. You need time to prepare… a place to talk. Will we ever get over the grief? Most people like to believe that they live in a just, orderly and stable world where good wins out in the end. It is this emotion which sometimes is expressed quite suddenly which makes the grieving person difficult to deal with. He spent a massive amount of money travelling to America for some miracle shark’s blood cure that, of course, did not work. Already a member? Like the avoiders they may just feel inadequate to cope with an emotional reaction. I believe that the event would affect me more mentally, emotionally and socially, then it would physically. Nearly every adult knows someone who has, or had, cancer. Anyone who has been on a counselling course knows some of the rudimentary skills to active listening. And lastly, life-long process. It is an unwavering truth that love never dies. This is what my mother would have done, and it is very welcome. The last stage is acceptance: of fate, destiny, the end-game. Denver School of Nursing In their book titled Living Through Loss: Interventions Across the Life Span, Hooyman and Kramer (2010) provide, Grief, loss, and death are all emotions and experiences that we often associate with negative life events. Who to blame? They want to express concern, but not lapse into anything deep. Each of these theories seems to conceive of grief as a linear process: there are stages that an individual must pass through on the way to accepting, or adjusting to, their loss. It has protected my heart from harm, even though grief still really hurts. Certainly there was the first stage, denial, especially among the metropolitan elite. The study of grief and bereavement has existed since the 1900’s when Freud came Counsellors and therapists talk about the grief process and grief stages. This group is perhaps the most helpful. Reflections From My Own Grieving For me at least, these theories do not describe my own experience of dealing with grief. Anger is alive and well in the social media. 07/21/2014 12:23 pm ET Updated Sep 20, 2014 "The pain passes but the beauty remains." They do this for many reasons. Some, once reassured, then swiftly move on to talking about other issues, having done their bit. Is it a function of personality or defensive mechanisms? Inevitably news got around….. What became most interesting to me was how those who knew my story reacted. The data would suggest otherwise. It is not that they do not believe in the talking cure, but rather that they supplement it. Personal reflections on coping and loss Professor Adrian Furnham writes. 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The only steadfast thing about grief is the love still felt for someone that is gone.